[Random Quotes]
"Summer has come and past / The innocent can never last / Wake me up when September ends..." -do I really need to say who sings this?

[Song currently stuck in my head]
Wake me up when September Ends by Green Day

[Needs]
Faith and Shadow...
A really really really big long hug
(according to Sam) A guy cuz apparently they make almost everything better...

[Looking forward to]
The end of September... 2 weeks

[Goals for now]
Date for homecoming??
Get my licsense (sp?)

I miss you both and I wish I could see you again...

Today marks the end of Revenge Week (thanks to My Chemical Romance), and I had so many goals to get back at the world, but it seems the world got back at me... so I wanted to ask...

WHAT THE HELL DID I DO WRONG?!

This has to have been one of the worst weeks of my life. Everything went okay Monday I guess... except for the fact that my new principal is the biggest bitch in the world... she's threatening to give out demerits to anyone who's late to LUNCH... that's some fucked up shit if you ask me. Tuesday was auditions for the fall play... Girl Crazy. I really wanted to make it because I've got so many friends that love the theater as much as I do and I knew a bunch of them would make it, and I didn't make it last year. Sam and I were really nervous, of course, but we both did peachy I guess, cuz we made first callbacks along with Jimmy, Skylar, and Brian. And I got to do my read with the legendary J-Money! That night I was really looking forward to the return of Gilmore Girls and the premiere of Supernatural, because I think Jared Padalecki is super hot. So my mom tells me I can watch Gilmore Girls but the TV's gotta go off after that. So I run into the other room to get the recorder ready and my timing is perfect... but I wanted to see what was going on up until the opening credits. I sit watching it and then my mom comes in and starts yellin at me as I'm trying to explain my plan calmly. Then I finally blow up, turn off the TV, go into my room and slam the door. Hard. Next thing I know mom's screaming at me and goes to turn off the recorder. I'm running out of my room screaming "No! Don't do it! I take it back!" but she doesn't listen. Recorder goes off. That's when I scream at her. I scream and yell and then run into my room, not even remembering what I said. I was so pissed off I couldn't concentrate on my homework. But after an hour of still being pissed I realized I'd better make up with her if I wanted a ride to school the next day.

And Wednesday... oh, God, Wednesday...

I felt a lot better waking up that morning. My heart was pounding a little faster, hoping I'd made first callbacks, which I did when I checked the theater call board that morning. That meant no voice lesson, but I couldn't go anyway, cuz I've still got my cough, which is also another bad thing that I've had for 2 weeks today. But Sam and I were all happy that we made callbacks, and Skylar was just like "oh here they go into their hyper moods..." and then I go find Christi, Zach and Anne. I sit with them and tell them my good news and as Zach leaves us "losers", Carissa comes up to me with a magazine in her hand. Teen Vogue and guess who's on the cover... the super sexy Orlando Bloom. I went nuts screaming "THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!" almost as loud as Carissa screams lol. So much good stuff happened to me that morning and pretty much that day that I thought the rest of the week would be great. But at the end of 8th hour the stitches in my great day started to come loose...

I meet Sam, Skylar, Jimmy and Brian in the PAC after school for 1st callbacks for the play. The guys all got called up at least 4 times each, but Sam got called up twice, and I only got called up once. But at least I got to do my reading with Brian, but it was kinda freaky cuz in the scene his character sort of hits on mine... Anywho, I was nervous again, because as much as I love acting and being on stage, I also have a slight case of stage fright. I didn't feel like I gave it my all, but I told myself that I'd do better next time. But, as I said earlier, there wasn't a next time. Bummer. Towards the end of auditions, Mr. Mazur asked if anyone felt cheated, like they didn't feel that they got to read enough, and asked those people to come onto the stage. But half the people, including me, stood up and started to the stage, and he stopped us, cuz he thought that we were too many. So after a brief conference with Ms. Sharpe, he told us we were all dismissed. I was really disappointed. So I go home, eat, and start on my homework. As I'm sitting on the couch watching TV, the phone rings. It's my dad, so I pick it up. He says 'hi', and immediately I can tell that something's wrong. I ask how he is and he tells me he's horrible. I ask why and then the worst part of revenge week is thrown in my face...

"We buried Faith today."

It takes me a second to find my vioce, and then another to find something for me to say as I listen to my dad sob on the phone. I don't think it hit me until the end of our conversation that Faith, my horse, is dead. That's when I feel the tears coming, we hang up. I couldn't believe it. Collic, that's what killed her. One of the best horses in the county. She was going to get emergency surgery, and she died on the way. She almost made it. But despite all the efforts of my dad, Darla, Lea, Deanne and the vet, it just wasn't enough. Everyone down there in Oklahoma is crushed. Lea says she'll never get on a horse again, but at least she's got a choice. What really kills me is that I may never be able to ride again... not by choice, but by order. My mom's been paranoid ever since my accident and tells me that I could ride Faith, and only Faith, but how am I going to be able to do that now? I love riding, you feel so free, you're one with the horse. They're your best friend. And now two of mine are gone...

Losing Faith reminded me of when I lost my Shadow... my very first horse. He was everything I ever dreamed of in a horse, he was mine when I was nine. He was old, about 22, but I still loved him so much... If you ever turned your back on Shadow purposfully when he was right behind you, he'd give you a nudge in the back that would shove you forward a step, it was his way of saying he missed you and the attention you gave him. He behaved extremely well... He was my first and my very best friend. Faith was like Shadow's shadow... if that makes sense. I remember when I got that call from my dad... I was 10 or 11... and after that I couldn't look at a picture of a horse for at least 6 months. I remember running to my room and tearing down all the pics of the horses that were on my walls, throwing everything horse in my room into a box - even my horse ring - and asking my mom to hide it in the basement. I cried for days. I couldn't take it. I was living it all over again. I saw my 10-year-old self sitting in the chair, holding the phone up to her ear, sobbing her eyes out. So Wednesday night as I was going to bed I asked God to give them extra peppermints, cuz I know how much they loved them. And I cried myself to sleep.

I cried when I woke up on Thursday. I cried when at school. {I'm crying as I'm writing this.} I checked the callboard... I didn't make the second callbacks, which means I didn't make the play. Neither did Sam, but the play really didn't matter to me at that point. I was such a mess when I got to school... Sam noticed my shirt when I met up with her and Skylar that morning, it was my Never mind the Cloudy Days shirt, and I didn't realize the irony until then, because I sure as hell mided this couldy day... that's when I started crying again. Sam and Skylar are great at cheering people up, and I guess Jimmy is too, cuz with him and his sunglasses, and Sam and Skylar with their squeaky cow toy with a dislocated neck thanks to us, I was laughing up until after the drama club pictures were taken... with us jumping as the photographer said "three!" *snap* Then I went into quiet mode the rest of the day, finding I still had tears to shed, barely concentrating in my classes and trying to keep myself from screaming out in pain.

As for today, Friday, it sucked as well. Zach's been sort of shutting me out, and if anyone knows me, they know that I hate it when people do that. So the girl you like likes you back. Congratulations. I mean it, honestly. I'm happy for you, just as long as things don't change between us. I still wanna be your best friend, the one you always talk to, the one you spill out your deepest and darkest secrets to, that's what I'm here for... to bottle them up and never speak of them to anyone else. I'm your horror movie buddy, the one you call at 11:30 at night for random conversations, the one that you made over 250 inside jokes with. The one you *used to* sit with at lunch. Remember those notes that you've kept for 2 years in your drawer? I wrote those. I also wrote about "Robbie" and his adventures. I've written a lot of things, including this entry.

This entry is coming directly from my broken heart, my tears that fall down my face, getting into my hated hair that's in my hated face. I'm screaming out, sobbing, can anyone hear me? I'm all alone, curled up in a ball, drowning in my tears of misery, desperate for help, can't you hear me? I need a hand to help me up, some reassurance, someone to tell me that everything will be okay...

[Random Quotes]
"Dean, come on... I know you're good at beating people up but don't do it to your best friend..." -Liv from my original story I'm working on... (yes, I'm actually working on it!)

[Song currently stuck in my head]
You're my Best Friend by Queen

[Needs]
Get Ice's torturous birthday present
Start up "you" fics!
Oh, and a hott guy in my possession

[Looking forward to]
American Idol tour... a few months
End of summer school... 3 days

[Goals for now]
Marry Constantine
Get my licsense (sp?)
Pass drivers test...

Summer days driftin' away, but, ah, oh those summer nights! lol a wee bit of moosic there. But my summer nights suck. The only things not so boring is writing and annoying Ice on the phone. And plotting evil things for next year with Pinky. The 4th ish tomorrow and I still don't know my plans . And me and Ice calculated that we only have 59 days til school starts! NOOOOO!!!! But on the bright side we're no longer freshmen (whew). Don't really have much else to say... but I've started some drawings too. One's a sketch of my anthro fursona (if I went to Hogwarts... ) and I'm quite proud of it... except the hand which was a NIGHTMARE to draw and it still turned out like shit. But the pleats in the skirt surprisingly turned out well!
       And (obviously) by the quote up there ^ I actually started up my book again! THERY'RE ACTUALLY OUT OF THAT DAMN GYM! w00t! Cookies for me! Oh wait... I've eaten too much junk already today... carrot sticks for me! () Ice why oh why did you make me go on this diet with you?! *Looks down at thunder-thighs and pudge* Oh yeah... *munches on raspberries* You go ahead and work on that six-pack of yours, Ice. FYI, I AM getting a slimmer waist! HA! (the yoplait/more calcium diet does work!) Don't really have much more to say. May post more later if I get any ideas  (but the 'idea' portion of my brain is currently in use...  to give them uniforms or not to give them uniforms... that is the question. o_O)

happy holidays to all ya'll Americans  so it only seems fitting to have THIS PARTICULAR...

[Random Pic]

[Random Quotes]
"Will! Ow! Me nose! Take it easy!" -Jack Sparrow from one of my Pirates of the Caribbean fanfics (Hehehe... he's got a bucket stuck on his head...  DON'T OWN HIM, HOWEVER!) ...No matter how much I wish...

[Song currently stuck in my head]
The song from the Nike 'run barefoot' commercial

[Needs]
LEARNER'S PERMIT!
Start up "you" fics!
Oh, and a hott guy in my possession

[Looking forward to]
American Idol tour... a few months
ORLANDO BLOOM ON DAVE LETTERMAN.... 15 min.

[Goals for now]
Marry Constantine
Get my licsense (sp?)
Pass the finals  (especially bio and algebra)

IT IS OFFICIALLY SUMMER!!!!!!!!!
.......and I'm still in school (driver's ED over summer... hey I wanna get my liscence soon, ok?! XP) Well, at least this is my HUUUUUUUGE sign that it's time to start writing again! Trying to do so as I'm doing this at the same time. Almost done with this chapter...

AND ICE IF YOU EVER POST ANYTHING INSULTING TO  ANYTHING/BODY THAT I LIKE/ADMIRE/WHATEVER OR ANYTHING INSULTING TO ME ON THIS JOURNAL OR TELL IT TO ME IN ANY OTHER WAY, I'LL KILL OFF YOUR CHARACTER IN MY STORY AND POST ALL THE BAD STUFF ABOUT YOU ON HERE!!!! (PUSH ME TOO FAR AND I'LL POST YOUR FULL NAME, ADDRESS, AND PHONE NUMBER. KAPEESH?!)

Now that that's out of my system I feel much better. And now it's time for the *drumroll*...

[RANDOM PIC]!!!

[Random Quotes]
"I'll make you safe no matter where you are..." part of song stuck in my head

[Song currently stuck in my head]
When You tell me that you Love Me... sung by the American Idols (top 

[Needs]
To pass all my finals  
Start up "you" fics!
Oh, and a hott guy in my possession

[Looking forward to]
American Idol tour... a few months
END OF SCHOOL!!!... TOMORROW!!!!

[Goals for now]
Marry Constantine
Get my licsense (sp?)
Pass the finals  (especially bio and algebra)

B-E-A-UUUUTIFUL weather we're having!!! Finals are ICK. Yucky-poo. I got the easy ones over on Friday (Theater and Band) and today I had Algebra () and gym. Test took 10 min, participation was insane. Me, Waye, Beth, and like 4 other girls were all against the most annoying kid in the UNIVERSE... Eric W. We were all offering money for whoever could hit him with the volleyball. So he was going into his usual hissy-fit and then Chuck comes up from the track and chucks another volleyball as hard as he can at Eric and it hits him in the side! It was as funny as hell!!!! Everyone around saw and started laughing too and Waye said to me "Look's like you owe Chuck $3!" It was hilarious!

Algebra was a nightmare though. She didn't even go over half the stuff on the last page with us! My teacher's stoopid. Well, *hopefully* that's the last time I'll have to put up with her teaching!

TOMORROW'S FINALS...
English and Biology 

I think the Beaver turned out to be roadkill... he was supposed to pick up a study guide at my house like an hour ago and he hasn't stopped by yet... *shrugs* Time to celebrate! BRING ON THE MARSHMALLOWS!

Tomorrow summer officially starts! And summer can only mean one thing to me... WRITING. I need to start up my 'you' fics again! I started a bunch of em last summer but never finished them... Thank goodness summer's almost here! I can't wait!

Oh, and here's a new addition the the journal... the
[Random Pic]

*drools* Yes, I do randomly click on a pic in my files... I just happened to chose the Rocker files, that's all . Ice, don't even think about saying anything about this Greek/Rock god

[Random Quotes]
"THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT IN MADISON, WISCONSIN, BABY!!!" -Billie Joe Armstrong of GREEN DAY on the American Idiot tour

[Song currently stuck in my head]
Music from Spiderman, and Holiday by Green Day

[Needs]
Ummm... chocolate anyone?
Oh, and a hott guy in my possession

[Looking forward to]
American Idol tour... a few months
END OF SCHOOL!!!... 20 DAYS!

[Goals for now]
Kill Brian
Marry Constantine
See Kingdom of Heaven
Pass the finals  (especially bio and algebra)

OMFG!!! Monday was the BEST Monday of my ENTIRE LIFE!!! No, I'm not crazy, but you'd be saying the same if you went to the GREEN DAY concert that I did! I guess I should start from the beginning so here it goes...

My alarm went off that morning and the first thing that popped into my mind was OMFG HOLY CRAP TODAY IS THE DAY I'M GOING TO SEE GREEN DAY!!! WOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!! Then I pressed the snooze button and fell back asleep . Then when the time came for me to get up or miss my ride I really thought OMFG HOLY CRAP TODAY IS THE DAY I'M GOING TO SEE GREEN DAY!!! WOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!! So then I got to school and everyone else was excited and all my classes seemed longer than they usually were but then FINALLY the final bell rang and I hurried off to my locker to meet Ice (who is a nightmare to ride in a car with for an hour), jumped in the car and off we were! The only bad thing about the concert was... my mom decided to tag along. Yep, my MOTHER. My over-protective, paranoid (yet most of the time fun) mother who despises half the words in Green Day's vocabulary. But back to the car ride. Insane Shane keeps sending me text messages saying "WOOOOO!" and Lisa claims she met Billie Joe, Tre, and Mike when they were waiting in line before we got there. Yeah right. But WE (I swear this) saw one of the buses that transports them on the highway on the way there! I'm dead serious!!! It was awesome! But no, we couldn't see anyone inside. So we get up there and we're super hungry and Lisa and Shane are still eating. So we drive around until we get lost and come to a decision of the two nearest food places: Subway or Pizza Pit. Ice, who'd already had Subway for lunch, decides on the pizza. Idiot. We order a smaller one and stand around for 15 minutes until they give it to us. But there are no tables in the place. So we're forced to eat it in the car. Wouldn't ya know it, I get pizza sauce all over my jeans which STILL haven't completely come out yet. So thanks for that Ice, whenever I wear those jeans I'll think of the time you made me split an entire pizza with you, me, and my mom.

And when we get there Shane's gleeking all over Lisa (Asil) and going crazier than usual and being perverted to Ice (tis a good thing they have no classes together... they might kill each other with their stupitity cuz God knows I'm hanging by a thread when I'm around them...) But we got in eventually, found some seats (we were way in the back and could STILL see Billie Joe's eyeliner) the guys left us breifly to check out girls (but like they could get any), came back and a half hour later My Chemical Romance came onto the stage. They were pretty good even though you could barely hear Gerard (what kind of a name is that for a ROCKER?!) over the bass. And I'll tell you, they said some things that slightly disturbed me and scarred my mom for life. But the look on her face was priceless. It's been almost five days and she hasn't talked about the concert ever since.

And then the screaming got louder. And louder. And then...
Tre (GD's drummer) walked onto the stage in that pink bunny suit with a bottle of beer... and went crazy. Soon after the rest of the band came on and kicked it off with American Idiot. I'm not gonna go into detail about the whole concert cuz I'd be sitting here typing all night but it was utterly AMAZING. It was my first show and I'll tell you, like Gerard of MCR said... "Well you picked a good one!" And I believe it.

Anywho, we had our band concert on Wednesday (it was Fine Arts Week at my school). We played stuff from Spiderman, The Matrix Reloaded, Braveheart, Chicago, and one patriotic song: Stars and Stripes Forever... which was an utter disaster. But somehow we managed to pull it together in the end. Mr. G was directing and wiping the sweat off his brow at the same time. Stupid Troy... how many times do we have to tell you NOT to get stoned before concerts?! lol, but seriously, that kid's the biggest druggie I've ever met. Before we started playing Braveheart, Steve, one of the seniors, came out in a KILT *shudders* pretending to be William Wallace's decendant. It was hilarious... we even had someone playing bagpipes!

Then, tonight was the Theater Showcase. It's basically where the drama kids perform scenes that they did over the year. I wish I could've been in it but the scene that I wanted to do with a group that I was in... they had schedule conflicts. Bummer. I wanted to be up on that stage! But some were fabulous, and others were eeeeeh... My fave had to be Say Good Night, Gracie, How May I Help You, A Crime in Progress, and Brian's Song - the MUSICAL. Don't ask me how they pulled THAT ONE off, but they did, and it was HILARIOUS. My school's really got talent, and I'm NOT talking about the sports teams.

Sick of typing, been a long week, time to watch the hunky Heath Ledger or one of the other hotties in my movie collections and cuddle up with the remote and a bowl of ice cream.

[Random Quotes]
"To have life is to love life and to love life is to have life." -Emily from the play Our Town.

[Song currently stuck in my head]
Music from Braveheart

[Needs]
CONSTANTINE MAROULIS BACK ON AMERICAN IDOL!!!!
A hug!

[Looking forward to]
Green Day concert... 6 days
Pray for the Soul of Betty debut album... 1 week

[Goals for now]
Kill Brian
Marry Constantine
See Kingdom of Heaven
Get FOX to realize that their show is RIGGED and do a RECOUNT for last week's votes!!!

I'm so upset right now and I'm not exactly sure why... maybe it's the injustice of the show I've been ranting on for the past few weeks or so many of the personal things I can't put in this journal...

A long time ago I 'fell into a hole' - that's how I put it - and this winter I swore to myself that I'd never fall back into that one again... only if I was absolutely sure of my emotions. But I'm afraid that I'm treading through an entire field of holes and being careful not to fall into them, but I'm so clumsy that I'm afraid I've fallen into many of them and can't seem to climb back out of them... but it's been driving me insane and I don't know how much more of this I can take.

Maybe it's just becaue I'm an emotional person or I'm letting my mind wander and my emotions totally take over my brain or I don't know. But I just wish the whole world wasn't so blind! Why can't everyone (especially the people around me) open their eyes? I know that the real world is practically made of iron right now, but mine is made of toothpicks and crumbling fast. I'm mad at everything and everyone and I know I sound like a five-year-old but it's true! In the play Our Town by Thorton Wilder, Emily says

"Is that all human beings are? Just blind people?"

I'm starting to believe the same myself. Open your eyes, people, and realize what life really is and who people really are, and look your hardest for what you truly desire. I've had my eyes open for the longest time, but it seems that every time I blink my one true desire darts past me and is gone before I open my eyes again. Or maybe I'm looking in all the wrong spots. Or maybe it doesn't even exist...

But I cry at night because of it. I fall into all those holes because of it. I can't speak because of it. I fall into depressions sometimes because of it. Each time I fall, though, I wait for myself to heal. Sometimes it takes seconds, sometimes it takes months, and everything in-between. But when I'm healed, I get back up and keep telling myself that the next hole I fall into could have that treasure inside that I'm waiting for.

[Random Quotes]
"I want to have a seizure!" -Brian C. (wtf man?!?!)
"This one works the blender..." -Bo Bice

[Song currently stuck in my head]
Cryin' by Aerosmith (sung by Constantine Maroulis for his audition for American Idol)

[Needs]
CONSTANTINE MAROULIS BACK ON AMERICAN IDOL!!!!

[Looking forward to]
Green Day concert... 1 WEEK!!!
Pray for the Soul of Betty debut album... 8 DAYS

[Goals for now]
Kill Brian
Marry Constantine
See Kingdom of Heaven
More to come when my brain starts working again...

I need to update more often.

I'm SOOOOOOO incredibly glad last week is over! It was torture, people! Honestly, if I had to go one more day of that hell you'd find me in Europe if I didn't kick the bucket first cuz I HATED (and still dislike) this country. America is so stupid for letting Constantine go and having Scott stay.  Please... I'd love to hear Scott sing Bohemian Rhapsody as well as Cons did. Bo is the only reason I'm watching the show now, and once he's gone (which will probably be soon by the way things are going) I quit. I wash my hands of that show. They don't know what TRUE talent is. I swear, Green Day is taking over nearly everything in my life... from my friends' minds to American Idol. It's turning into American Idiot! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! Cried for 2 1/2 hours Wednesday night. Was on the radio the next morning along with a bunch of other upset Cons fans. Wrote a letter to producers of AI. Hopefully they've got it. Enough about that though, I'm still upset and I'll stop before that leg spasm starts again and I kill my computer with my lethal leg.

MORP (prom backwards... literally) was on Saturday night too. I like dances but I can't stand dances... when you're with your friends it's okay but you always feel awful when those slow dances start and no one wants to dance with you. Makes you feel so lonely inside. Your friends try to comfort you but it the only remedy for what you're feeling is for that wish to come true. And I'm still waiting for some guy to realize who I really am...

Gonna stop there. That's all for now, folks. But, I'll leave you with THIS...

Miss you Cons. Love ya always!  You're MY Funny Valentine! (Shut up, I know it's May...)

Perhaps things have always been crummy or I've never really experienced life before. Or maybe I'm just getting caught up in my own fantasies about life or something... or maybe it's the weather. But I've been feeling perfectly peachy. And it's great. Seriously, the weather's warmer, I'm getting less homework,  my friends are... well, being themselves lol, and everything's going great!

Just watch, I probably jinxed myself now...

And I got my braces off! WHEEEEE! Aah, the feel of teeth! lol. The GD concert is coming up too... 37 days according to Asil.

And wouldn't cha know it, I'm going through writer's block again... I'm trying to write an original.

Oh, and the most hilarious thing that happened to me over spring break...
I PUT A HOLE IN MY WALL!!! YES! Ice came over and we were watching a movie. We went into the kitchen to make popcorn but started eating it in there and I'd left my retainer case in the other room. Well, I had my shoes off, and the floor was linoleum. Very slippery with socks. So I go running out of the kitchen, turn a corner and go BOOM. I land on my wrist, sprain it, got a huge bruise on my knee as well, and I didn't even notice the hole until my mom and Ice come running into the hallway. But I wasn't hurt, I sat up and started laughing my head off. And when my mom pointed out the hole I just laughed even harder! Thank goodness I'm not in trouble... the hole is 3 inches in diameter. Oops . You can always count on my clumsiness...

Time to try and write! Toodles!

Wow, life's been throwing curveballs at me lately! My school's musical was this weekend (everybody cut footloose!) and some of my friends were in it. They did an awesome job, and like one of them said, it WAS the best musical ever to hit my high school! However, I must say, the guy who played the main character REALLY isn't too shabby lookin' . *sigh* what is it with my thing for guys with long hair?! Does this mean that this is the end of Rootbeer?! *shrugs* Well, the guy can REALLY, REALLY dance. And sing. And act. And I'm going into la-la land just thinking about it. Jk! *laughs* Now, before the show they had a pre-show thing, a documentary of the stuff that went on during rehersals and stuff. Wow, it looked like a lot of fun! Wish I could've been a part of it! (I tried out but didn't make it ) The doc. was professionally made, which made it even better, and the song that they played for it was really sweet too. The lyrics went something like "Do you realize how quickly life goes by?... It's hard to make the good times last..." Lucky for me they're selling copies of the musical, pre-show included, so I get to see my friends, the wonderful pre-show, (and not to mention the hot guy) any time I want!

Sorry this one's so short, but I'm trying to write an original story... and I don't really have anything else to add except...
GOOD LUCK MEMBERS OF THE G.I.!! BRING HOME THE STATE TROPHY!

Well it's been a while since I updated the ol' webby journal here so I might as well start covering the past few days of my life. All my classes ('cept band, theater and lunch) have been basically the same. But set crew for the musical is a blast! Everyone's really nice and crazy and hilarious. Especially the guys, Kinney and Sheer. I couldn't go today (if I could then I wouldn't be sitting on my bum writing this right now... piano lesson).

But crew's something I'll go into details about later... I've just recieved some of the most shocking news of my life and if it goes through then everything in my life will go upside-down and never be the same. Ever. Again.

My best friend's dad got laid off and she might have to move to another state. I'm so upset I'm crying as I'm writing this. How is anything going to be the same without her? Who am I going to laugh with, cry with, go bowling with, go on bike rides with over the summer? For nearly two years I've known her and I know it might not seem like a lot of time, but it feels like we've known each other since we were in diapers. We've been through so much together now I might never see her again. It scares me to think about it. I want to do something, to help her dad find a job, to find some way to comfort my friend, ANYTHING. But we're both so shocked and disbelieving and almost scared now that I don't think either of us know what to do. But the only thing I can think of is say a prayer.

Forget all my old goals... getting Rootbeer to notice me, bring my algebra grade up from the dirt, get that original story started... none of them matter anymore. She is my #1 goal now... she's going to stay in the same house she's been in for the rest of her life, stay in our school, stay with us. She's NOT going to move a thousand miles away; I'm still going to be able to ride my bike to her house. She's NOT going to be in a new school; I'm still going to see her every morning, and open her band locker for her when her lock won't cooperate with her. And I'm NOT going to cry... I'm going to stay strong, keep us laughing and happy, not sad and teary. Everything's going to be as it's always been...

So for all of you who know me, personally or through the web, I'm begging you, down on my knees and pleading, for you to say a prayer for my friend. She doesn't want to move and no one else that knows her wants her to either.

But even if none of you do I'm going to be down on my knees and praying with all my heart and soul every night, to all the angels in the sky to keep her here, laughing and happy, with us and not in some new territory. Just please, please, say a little prayer...